I don’t mean to pick on the Gainesville (Ga.) Times, I really don’t. (Editor’s note: Yes, you do. Now I’m fisking myself). But, it is “Georgia’s Best Newspaper Site,” so let’s have at it.
Ted Oglesby: retired opinion page editor, columnist, bow tie wearer and shameless self promoter.
I’ll cut to the chase. Ted just wrote a column about national security. He mentions politics, military planning, terrorism, etc., and wraps up his piece thusly:
This war is vastly different. In wars past, our enemies were nation-states. While the activities in this war are in nation-states, the actual war is against an intangible, loosely organized terrorism with diverse interests.
No rules of engagement such as the Geneva Convention exist. We’re having to engage by ear, by trial and error. When you demand no errors in such a situation, you demand perfection that humans simply don’t possess.
Incidentally, if you want to learn how terror organizations differ, are organized, cooperate, are trained, financed, etc., you might consider taking the terrorism course I’m teaching at Brenau’s Bulli program this fall.
Write me at the address below or contact Bulli for more information.
Let’s imagine the discussion in the opinion-page wing of the Gainesville Times megaplex…
Opinion Page Editor: Hey Ted, I’d like to talk to you about your column.
Ted: Sure thing sport.
OPE: First off, I like the tone. If we need to water board a few punks, then some cheese-eating bureaucrat in Geneva ain’t going to tell us any different.
Ted: Damn straight champ.
OPE: I have one question. Isn’t this column just a teaser for your terrorism course?
Ted: Listen here bucko, I’ve been editing copy since the Teapot Dome scandal. Teddy Roosevelt once punched me in the mouth after I called him a pantie waste. I’ll be damned if some nipple drinker is going to tell me my business. Go back to your iTubes and your MyFace, and leave this job to the professionals!
OPE: OK then, I’ll add “incidentally” to the second-to-last graf and we should be fine. OK?
Ted: Bullfeathers.
End Scene.
