Hacks love conflicts of interest. We understand. Here at Small Time Hacks, our publisher, Colonel Thadeus T. Beauregard (Spanish-American War veteran and hand sanitizer baron), is an old hand at squeezing ad dollars out of his chamber of commerce buddies in exchange for puff pieces. I once wrote a four-part series on a chimney sweep’s ISO compliance. But I never mix business with pleasure. For instance, you’ll never see this scribbler shamelessly plugging his college buddy’s CD after enticing his audience with an amusing anecdote about toilet shenanigans. But then, I’m not Northeast Mississippi Daily Journal editor Lloyd Gray:
My last year and a half in college, I lived in a ramshackle old house with a hole in the kitchen floor and a thorny green plant sticking out of a commode seat on the front porch.
The latter touch was courtesy of my buddy David Womack, lord of the manor and collector of my $40 monthly rent check….
We called him DaWoMac, and by “lord of the manor” we meant, “guy who was always hiding sharp, thorny things in toilet seats.”
Womack was, quite simply, the funniest person I have ever known. Not in a strenuous, overly trying sort of way, but very naturally and whimsically.
DaWoMac was like a wood nymph — a hilarious, ass-thorning wood nymph. Which leads us to the obvious:
David Womack – known professionally by the moniker Dafe Womack, since there’s another entertainer with the same name – has released a single of children’s songs called, “Hold Your Nose When You Swallow a Goat.”
Yes, that’s right, “Dafe.” And yes, that right’s, goat swallowing. Then, after pulling me in close with Dafe Tales, Lloyd slips in the knife:
Yes, he’s my old friend, and it’s probably professionally questionable for me to do it, but here goes: I think it’s absolutely great. Call me biased, but you’ll just have to trust me that I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it…It’s on sale at Reed’s in Tupelo and Square Books in Oxford, and maybe other places soon.
Trust me, because I exercise sound professional judgment by throwing out my credibility for the sake of Dafe’s Greatest Hits. Trust me, because I’m telling you I have a conflict. It’s like those charmers who say, “no pun intended,” when they are, in fact, pun intending. Your Jedi mind tricks won’t work on me Lloyd.
1 Comment
June 23, 2008 at 9:16 pm
I could have used more insight on Dafe’s brother Neil from Tupelo.